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Baby Come Back

A memoir by a mother whose child prepares for college



MOTHER NATURE, AS THE NAME IMPLIES, IS UNPREDICTABLE. She gives you an amazing miracle in the form of the sweetest baby the world has ever seen. In the first instant of that little life, your heart opens wide and your child crawls inside and takes up residence there. Minutes, hours, years go by. He/she thrums away in your heart, coloring your every move, every decision and every emotion. You get used to that thrumming; it becomes part of you. You watch all your child’s firsts with love and pride-filled eyes. You don’t react with the terror that grips you when they take their first tumble; instead, you smile, suppress the urge to lunge for them, and encourage them to get up and go on their way. And because they didn’t see the fear in your heart, they do just that; get up and go on their way. That’s only one of the many times you do that for them, but it pales in comparison to what is required when they go away to college.

As long as they are in the house, underfoot, you feel their place in your heart is still fully occupied. You don’t think twice as you enthusiastically jump into the car and drive hundreds of miles to walk campus after campus to help your child find the right school. You hold your thoughts inside, size him/her up out of the corner of your eye and hope that on the long drive home, they give you some inkling of their thoughts. All the while, they are still with you. They still need you to buy milk, help them sort out a problem with a teacher, and sometimes they might even want to watch a movie with you.

Then, the colleges are chosen, the applications are mailed off, and the acceptance letters come in. Before you know it, you’re writing out the check that assures your child’s admittance into the college of their choice. You shop for clothes. You buy special linens to fit the dorm-room bed, and you  imagine the proud day when you’ll drive them to school to get settled into their new life.

And this is when Mother Nature plays her dirty trick.

Being the brave mother you are, you wave goodbye, and not looking back, drive home to a place you don’t recognize. Everything is where it was but there’s a quiet you’ve never experienced before. You and the family dog stand and stare at the now clean room that until a few days ago was a smelly sty so dense with teenage detritus you couldn’t even enter. And you remember your child sitting in the midst, happily ensconced in the cacophony of video game monsters being killed, rock music, and IM dings from the computer.

This new quiet is positively deafening.

Dear old Mother Nature doesn’t prepare you for the cold, harsh emptiness of the empty nest. Your child is still thrumming away in your heart but there’s nothing for you to do. You try and turn your mind away, but thoughts of them keep creeping back in. Will they remember to brush their teeth, do their laundry, or even at least once, change those specially bought sheets? Mother Nature gives them to you and then, just like that, takes them away. You spend their entire existence holding on to them for dear life and now you’re supposed to let them go? It’s impossible. Yet, as you stand disoriented in the middle of your new old home, it finally hits you; letting them go is probably the biggest gesture of love you’ll ever make. Now you just have to figure
out how to quiet the thrumming in your heart.

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May 2016

On Friday, April 29th Westport First Selectman Jim Marpe and Serena & Lily co-founders Serena Dugan and Lily Kanter invite the public to join...

Cost: Free

Where:
35 Elm Street
Westport, CT
View map »

More information

The exhibition Robert Rauschenberg: Spreads and Related Works is a group of paintings and works on paper chosen to compliment the painting Recital (Spread), 1980 which Philip Johnson purchased...

Cost: $35 includes tour

Where:
The Glass House
199 Elm Street
New Canaan , CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: The Glass House
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to announce its upcoming solo exhibition “Jill Moser: Paintings & Prints” to be held April 16-May 28.   An opening reception will be held for...

Cost: Free

Where:
Heather Gaudio Fine Art
66 Elm Street
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: Heather Gaudio Fine Art
Telephone: (203)801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

The Glass House is pleased to present Yayoi Kusama: Narcissus Garden, a landscape installation that will be on view throughout the 2016 tour season to celebrate the 110th anniversary of Philip...

Cost: $35 includes tour

Where:
The Glass House
199 Elm Street
New Canaan , CT  06840
View map »


Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

The exhibition Robert Rauschenberg: Spreads and Related Works is a group of paintings and works on paper chosen to compliment the painting Recital (Spread), 1980 which Philip Johnson purchased...

Cost: $35 includes tour

Where:
The Glass House
199 Elm Street
New Canaan , CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: The Glass House
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to announce its upcoming solo exhibition “Jill Moser: Paintings & Prints” to be held April 16-May 28.   An opening reception will be held for...

Cost: Free

Where:
Heather Gaudio Fine Art
66 Elm Street
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: Heather Gaudio Fine Art
Telephone: (203)801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

The Glass House is pleased to present Yayoi Kusama: Narcissus Garden, a landscape installation that will be on view throughout the 2016 tour season to celebrate the 110th anniversary of Philip...

Cost: $35 includes tour

Where:
The Glass House
199 Elm Street
New Canaan , CT  06840
View map »


Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

Join Karen Newman – Inspirational Speaker, Author, World Class Athlete, Mother and Survivor at Pryority, Halo Studio J on Tuesday, May 3rd between 7-8.30pm - where she will tell her...

Cost: $25.00

Where:
Pryority Wellness
45 Grove Street
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to announce its upcoming solo exhibition “Jill Moser: Paintings & Prints” to be held April 16-May 28.   An opening reception will be held for...

Cost: Free

Where:
Heather Gaudio Fine Art
66 Elm Street
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: Heather Gaudio Fine Art
Telephone: (203)801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to announce its upcoming solo exhibition “Jill Moser: Paintings & Prints” to be held April 16-May 28.   An opening reception will be held for...

Cost: Free

Where:
Heather Gaudio Fine Art
66 Elm Street
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: Heather Gaudio Fine Art
Telephone: (203)801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

The festival will feature documentary films covering a diversity of subjects- including water and air quality, waste, energy issues and the importance of species preservation.  ...

Cost: free and open to the public

Where:
Sacred Heart University
5151 Park Ave.
Frank & Marisa Martire Business & Communication Center
Fairfield, CT  06825
View map »


Sponsor: Bigelow Tea, Sacred Heart's Film and Television Master's Program, Fairfield Earth Day
Telephone: 203-336-5164
Contact Name: Shawn
Website »

More information

The exhibition Robert Rauschenberg: Spreads and Related Works is a group of paintings and works on paper chosen to compliment the painting Recital (Spread), 1980 which Philip Johnson purchased...

Cost: $35 includes tour

Where:
The Glass House
199 Elm Street
New Canaan , CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: The Glass House
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to announce its upcoming solo exhibition “Jill Moser: Paintings & Prints” to be held April 16-May 28.   An opening reception will be held for...

Cost: Free

Where:
Heather Gaudio Fine Art
66 Elm Street
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: Heather Gaudio Fine Art
Telephone: (203)801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

The Glass House is pleased to present Yayoi Kusama: Narcissus Garden, a landscape installation that will be on view throughout the 2016 tour season to celebrate the 110th anniversary of Philip...

Cost: $35 includes tour

Where:
The Glass House
199 Elm Street
New Canaan , CT  06840
View map »


Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

Fairfield County philanthropic organization Near & Far Aid will hold a 2016 Designer House Tour which opens the doors to six exclusive homes decorated by renowned designers in the gold coast...

Cost: $65 in advance/ $75 day of

Where:
Fairfield, Southport, Westport
VARIOUS LOCATIONS - PRIVATE HOMES
, CT
View map »


Sponsor: Near & Far Aid
Telephone: 203-259-1710
Contact Name: Jessica Grutkowski
Website »

More information

The festival will feature documentary films covering a diversity of subjects- including water and air quality, waste, energy issues and the importance of species preservation.  ...

Cost: free and open to the public

Where:
Sacred Heart University
5151 Park Ave.
Frank & Marisa Martire Business & Communication Center
Fairfield, CT  06825
View map »


Sponsor: Bigelow Tea, Sacred Heart's Film and Television Master's Program, Fairfield Earth Day
Telephone: 203-336-5164
Contact Name: Shawn
Website »

More information

The exhibition Robert Rauschenberg: Spreads and Related Works is a group of paintings and works on paper chosen to compliment the painting Recital (Spread), 1980 which Philip Johnson purchased...

Cost: $35 includes tour

Where:
The Glass House
199 Elm Street
New Canaan , CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: The Glass House
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to announce its upcoming solo exhibition “Jill Moser: Paintings & Prints” to be held April 16-May 28.   An opening reception will be held for...

Cost: Free

Where:
Heather Gaudio Fine Art
66 Elm Street
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: Heather Gaudio Fine Art
Telephone: (203)801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

The Glass House is pleased to present Yayoi Kusama: Narcissus Garden, a landscape installation that will be on view throughout the 2016 tour season to celebrate the 110th anniversary of Philip...

Cost: $35 includes tour

Where:
The Glass House
199 Elm Street
New Canaan , CT  06840
View map »


Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

This special sale day is a tax-free event at Silvermine Arts Center. Great prices—$1 to $5 for many items—can be found throughout the tag sale.  Items include paints (oil,...

Cost: Free and open to the public

Where:
Silvermine Arts Center
1037 Silvermine Road
New Canaan, CT
View map »


Telephone: 203-966-9700
Website »

More information

The festival will feature documentary films covering a diversity of subjects- including water and air quality, waste, energy issues and the importance of species preservation.  ...

Cost: free and open to the public

Where:
Sacred Heart University
5151 Park Ave.
Frank & Marisa Martire Business & Communication Center
Fairfield, CT  06825
View map »


Sponsor: Bigelow Tea, Sacred Heart's Film and Television Master's Program, Fairfield Earth Day
Telephone: 203-336-5164
Contact Name: Shawn
Website »

More information

The exhibition Robert Rauschenberg: Spreads and Related Works is a group of paintings and works on paper chosen to compliment the painting Recital (Spread), 1980 which Philip Johnson purchased...

Cost: $35 includes tour

Where:
The Glass House
199 Elm Street
New Canaan , CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: The Glass House
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to announce its upcoming solo exhibition “Jill Moser: Paintings & Prints” to be held April 16-May 28.   An opening reception will be held for...

Cost: Free

Where:
Heather Gaudio Fine Art
66 Elm Street
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: Heather Gaudio Fine Art
Telephone: (203)801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

The Glass House is pleased to present Yayoi Kusama: Narcissus Garden, a landscape installation that will be on view throughout the 2016 tour season to celebrate the 110th anniversary of Philip...

Cost: $35 includes tour

Where:
The Glass House
199 Elm Street
New Canaan , CT  06840
View map »


Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...
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