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Baby Come Back

A memoir by a mother whose child prepares for college



MOTHER NATURE, AS THE NAME IMPLIES, IS UNPREDICTABLE. She gives you an amazing miracle in the form of the sweetest baby the world has ever seen. In the first instant of that little life, your heart opens wide and your child crawls inside and takes up residence there. Minutes, hours, years go by. He/she thrums away in your heart, coloring your every move, every decision and every emotion. You get used to that thrumming; it becomes part of you. You watch all your child’s firsts with love and pride-filled eyes. You don’t react with the terror that grips you when they take their first tumble; instead, you smile, suppress the urge to lunge for them, and encourage them to get up and go on their way. And because they didn’t see the fear in your heart, they do just that; get up and go on their way. That’s only one of the many times you do that for them, but it pales in comparison to what is required when they go away to college.

As long as they are in the house, underfoot, you feel their place in your heart is still fully occupied. You don’t think twice as you enthusiastically jump into the car and drive hundreds of miles to walk campus after campus to help your child find the right school. You hold your thoughts inside, size him/her up out of the corner of your eye and hope that on the long drive home, they give you some inkling of their thoughts. All the while, they are still with you. They still need you to buy milk, help them sort out a problem with a teacher, and sometimes they might even want to watch a movie with you.

Then, the colleges are chosen, the applications are mailed off, and the acceptance letters come in. Before you know it, you’re writing out the check that assures your child’s admittance into the college of their choice. You shop for clothes. You buy special linens to fit the dorm-room bed, and you  imagine the proud day when you’ll drive them to school to get settled into their new life.

And this is when Mother Nature plays her dirty trick.

Being the brave mother you are, you wave goodbye, and not looking back, drive home to a place you don’t recognize. Everything is where it was but there’s a quiet you’ve never experienced before. You and the family dog stand and stare at the now clean room that until a few days ago was a smelly sty so dense with teenage detritus you couldn’t even enter. And you remember your child sitting in the midst, happily ensconced in the cacophony of video game monsters being killed, rock music, and IM dings from the computer.

This new quiet is positively deafening.

Dear old Mother Nature doesn’t prepare you for the cold, harsh emptiness of the empty nest. Your child is still thrumming away in your heart but there’s nothing for you to do. You try and turn your mind away, but thoughts of them keep creeping back in. Will they remember to brush their teeth, do their laundry, or even at least once, change those specially bought sheets? Mother Nature gives them to you and then, just like that, takes them away. You spend their entire existence holding on to them for dear life and now you’re supposed to let them go? It’s impossible. Yet, as you stand disoriented in the middle of your new old home, it finally hits you; letting them go is probably the biggest gesture of love you’ll ever make. Now you just have to figure
out how to quiet the thrumming in your heart.

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July 2015

Curators: Michelle Grabner & Brad Killam, Co-founders of the Suburban and the Poor Farm June 6 through July 26, 2015 - See more...

Cost: Free

Where:
Silvermine Art Center
1037 Silvermine Road
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Telephone: 203.966.9700
Website »

More information

Reception to celebrate more than 50 Wilton artists displaying diverse styles, media, and subjects in this Annual Summer Show. View favorite artists and discover new talent. Exhibit runs through...

Cost: Free

Where:
Wilton Library
137 Old Ridgefield Road
Wilton, CT  06897
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Website »

More information

“The Best Book Sale in New England" Friday, July 24 to Tuesday, July 28, 2015, see below for daily hours OVER 120,000 BOOKS, plus CDs, DVDs, RECORDS, etc., plus unique Specials...

Cost: Free

Where:
Pequot Library
720 Pequot Avenue
Southport, CT  06890
View map »


Sponsor: Pequot Library
Telephone: 203) 259-0346
Contact Name: Front Desk
Website »

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Opening May 29 – August 15 in the Silvermine Room “The Cartoonists of Silvermine: Past and Present” is an historical retrospective exhibiting over seventy reproductions of...

Cost: $5 Suggested donation

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203.966.1776
Contact Name: Nicole Thelen
Website »

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July 7 through September 2015 A new exhibit of Kashmir shawls is opening at the New Canaan Historical Society’s Costumes Museum. The shawls shown reflect the preferences of Americans...

Cost: $5.00 suggested donation

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203-966-1776
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Historic Barns: Yesterday & Today Photographs by Kip Farrell Town House, Parlor Room Tuesday-Saturday, Walk-in May 21 – September Featuring photographs of New Canaan...

Cost: $5.00 Admission

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203.966.1776
Contact Name: Nicole Thelen
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Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to present its upcoming summer exhibition “Color Untitled” to be held June 3rd through August 1st, 2015.  The group show will consist of...

Cost: Free

Where:
Heather Gaudio Fine Art
21 South Avenue
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: Heather Gaudio Fine Art
Telephone: (203)801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
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More information

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Reception to celebrate more than 50 Wilton artists displaying diverse styles, media, and subjects in this Annual Summer Show. View favorite artists and discover new talent. Exhibit runs through...

Cost: Free

Where:
Wilton Library
137 Old Ridgefield Road
Wilton, CT  06897
View map »


Website »

More information

“The Best Book Sale in New England" Friday, July 24 to Tuesday, July 28, 2015, see below for daily hours OVER 120,000 BOOKS, plus CDs, DVDs, RECORDS, etc., plus unique Specials...

Cost: Free

Where:
Pequot Library
720 Pequot Avenue
Southport, CT  06890
View map »


Sponsor: Pequot Library
Telephone: 203) 259-0346
Contact Name: Front Desk
Website »

More information

Opening May 29 – August 15 in the Silvermine Room “The Cartoonists of Silvermine: Past and Present” is an historical retrospective exhibiting over seventy reproductions of...

Cost: $5 Suggested donation

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203.966.1776
Contact Name: Nicole Thelen
Website »

More information

July 7 through September 2015 A new exhibit of Kashmir shawls is opening at the New Canaan Historical Society’s Costumes Museum. The shawls shown reflect the preferences of Americans...

Cost: $5.00 suggested donation

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203-966-1776
Website »

More information

Historic Barns: Yesterday & Today Photographs by Kip Farrell Town House, Parlor Room Tuesday-Saturday, Walk-in May 21 – September Featuring photographs of New Canaan...

Cost: $5.00 Admission

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203.966.1776
Contact Name: Nicole Thelen
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to present its upcoming summer exhibition “Color Untitled” to be held June 3rd through August 1st, 2015.  The group show will consist of...

Cost: Free

Where:
Heather Gaudio Fine Art
21 South Avenue
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: Heather Gaudio Fine Art
Telephone: (203)801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
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Join Mr. Fish and Lisa Lou as they show how fun the magic of science can be by revealing the amazing secrets behind mind-blowing tricks. The audience will learn how to perform their own magical...

Cost: $7.50-$20

Where:
The Palace Theatre
61 Atlantic Street
Stamford, CT  06901
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Telephone: 203-325-4466
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Reception to celebrate more than 50 Wilton artists displaying diverse styles, media, and subjects in this Annual Summer Show. View favorite artists and discover new talent. Exhibit runs through...

Cost: Free

Where:
Wilton Library
137 Old Ridgefield Road
Wilton, CT  06897
View map »


Website »

More information

“The Best Book Sale in New England" Friday, July 24 to Tuesday, July 28, 2015, see below for daily hours OVER 120,000 BOOKS, plus CDs, DVDs, RECORDS, etc., plus unique Specials...

Cost: Free

Where:
Pequot Library
720 Pequot Avenue
Southport, CT  06890
View map »


Sponsor: Pequot Library
Telephone: 203) 259-0346
Contact Name: Front Desk
Website »

More information

Opening May 29 – August 15 in the Silvermine Room “The Cartoonists of Silvermine: Past and Present” is an historical retrospective exhibiting over seventy reproductions of...

Cost: $5 Suggested donation

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203.966.1776
Contact Name: Nicole Thelen
Website »

More information

July 7 through September 2015 A new exhibit of Kashmir shawls is opening at the New Canaan Historical Society’s Costumes Museum. The shawls shown reflect the preferences of Americans...

Cost: $5.00 suggested donation

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203-966-1776
Website »

More information

Historic Barns: Yesterday & Today Photographs by Kip Farrell Town House, Parlor Room Tuesday-Saturday, Walk-in May 21 – September Featuring photographs of New Canaan...

Cost: $5.00 Admission

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203.966.1776
Contact Name: Nicole Thelen
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to present its upcoming summer exhibition “Color Untitled” to be held June 3rd through August 1st, 2015.  The group show will consist of...

Cost: Free

Where:
Heather Gaudio Fine Art
21 South Avenue
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: Heather Gaudio Fine Art
Telephone: (203)801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

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Reception to celebrate more than 50 Wilton artists displaying diverse styles, media, and subjects in this Annual Summer Show. View favorite artists and discover new talent. Exhibit runs through...

Cost: Free

Where:
Wilton Library
137 Old Ridgefield Road
Wilton, CT  06897
View map »


Website »

More information

Opening May 29 – August 15 in the Silvermine Room “The Cartoonists of Silvermine: Past and Present” is an historical retrospective exhibiting over seventy reproductions of...

Cost: $5 Suggested donation

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203.966.1776
Contact Name: Nicole Thelen
Website »

More information

July 7 through September 2015 A new exhibit of Kashmir shawls is opening at the New Canaan Historical Society’s Costumes Museum. The shawls shown reflect the preferences of Americans...

Cost: $5.00 suggested donation

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203-966-1776
Website »

More information

Historic Barns: Yesterday & Today Photographs by Kip Farrell Town House, Parlor Room Tuesday-Saturday, Walk-in May 21 – September Featuring photographs of New Canaan...

Cost: $5.00 Admission

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203.966.1776
Contact Name: Nicole Thelen
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to present its upcoming summer exhibition “Color Untitled” to be held June 3rd through August 1st, 2015.  The group show will consist of...

Cost: Free

Where:
Heather Gaudio Fine Art
21 South Avenue
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: Heather Gaudio Fine Art
Telephone: (203)801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

Reception to celebrate more than 50 Wilton artists displaying diverse styles, media, and subjects in this Annual Summer Show. View favorite artists and discover new talent. Exhibit runs through...

Cost: Free

Where:
Wilton Library
137 Old Ridgefield Road
Wilton, CT  06897
View map »


Website »

More information

Opening May 29 – August 15 in the Silvermine Room “The Cartoonists of Silvermine: Past and Present” is an historical retrospective exhibiting over seventy reproductions of...

Cost: $5 Suggested donation

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203.966.1776
Contact Name: Nicole Thelen
Website »

More information

July 7 through September 2015 A new exhibit of Kashmir shawls is opening at the New Canaan Historical Society’s Costumes Museum. The shawls shown reflect the preferences of Americans...

Cost: $5.00 suggested donation

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203-966-1776
Website »

More information

Historic Barns: Yesterday & Today Photographs by Kip Farrell Town House, Parlor Room Tuesday-Saturday, Walk-in May 21 – September Featuring photographs of New Canaan...

Cost: $5.00 Admission

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203.966.1776
Contact Name: Nicole Thelen
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to present its upcoming summer exhibition “Color Untitled” to be held June 3rd through August 1st, 2015.  The group show will consist of...

Cost: Free

Where:
Heather Gaudio Fine Art
21 South Avenue
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: Heather Gaudio Fine Art
Telephone: (203)801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

Reception to celebrate more than 50 Wilton artists displaying diverse styles, media, and subjects in this Annual Summer Show. View favorite artists and discover new talent. Exhibit runs through...

Cost: Free

Where:
Wilton Library
137 Old Ridgefield Road
Wilton, CT  06897
View map »


Website »

More information

Opening May 29 – August 15 in the Silvermine Room “The Cartoonists of Silvermine: Past and Present” is an historical retrospective exhibiting over seventy reproductions of...

Cost: $5 Suggested donation

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203.966.1776
Contact Name: Nicole Thelen
Website »

More information

July 7 through September 2015 A new exhibit of Kashmir shawls is opening at the New Canaan Historical Society’s Costumes Museum. The shawls shown reflect the preferences of Americans...

Cost: $5.00 suggested donation

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203-966-1776
Website »

More information

Historic Barns: Yesterday & Today Photographs by Kip Farrell Town House, Parlor Room Tuesday-Saturday, Walk-in May 21 – September Featuring photographs of New Canaan...

Cost: $5.00 Admission

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203.966.1776
Contact Name: Nicole Thelen
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to present its upcoming summer exhibition “Color Untitled” to be held June 3rd through August 1st, 2015.  The group show will consist of...

Cost: Free

Where:
Heather Gaudio Fine Art
21 South Avenue
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: Heather Gaudio Fine Art
Telephone: (203)801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

Reception to celebrate more than 50 Wilton artists displaying diverse styles, media, and subjects in this Annual Summer Show. View favorite artists and discover new talent. Exhibit runs through...

Cost: Free

Where:
Wilton Library
137 Old Ridgefield Road
Wilton, CT  06897
View map »


Website »

More information

Opening May 29 – August 15 in the Silvermine Room “The Cartoonists of Silvermine: Past and Present” is an historical retrospective exhibiting over seventy reproductions of...

Cost: $5 Suggested donation

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203.966.1776
Contact Name: Nicole Thelen
Website »

More information

July 7 through September 2015 A new exhibit of Kashmir shawls is opening at the New Canaan Historical Society’s Costumes Museum. The shawls shown reflect the preferences of Americans...

Cost: $5.00 suggested donation

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203-966-1776
Website »

More information

Historic Barns: Yesterday & Today Photographs by Kip Farrell Town House, Parlor Room Tuesday-Saturday, Walk-in May 21 – September Featuring photographs of New Canaan...

Cost: $5.00 Admission

Where:
New Canaan Historical Society
13 Oenoke Ridge
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: New Canaan Historical Society
Telephone: 203.966.1776
Contact Name: Nicole Thelen
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to present its upcoming summer exhibition “Color Untitled” to be held June 3rd through August 1st, 2015.  The group show will consist of...

Cost: Free

Where:
Heather Gaudio Fine Art
21 South Avenue
New Canaan, CT  06840
View map »


Sponsor: Heather Gaudio Fine Art
Telephone: (203)801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

Discover your inner artist while painting outside with watercolor supplies provided by Weir Farm National Historic Site! This is part of the National Park Services. On Saturdays from...

Cost: Free

Where:
Weir Farm National Historic Site
735 Nod Hill Road
Witon, CT  06897
View map »


Telephone: 203-834-1896
Website »

More information

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