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Teach Your Children Well

Parenting classes



“Spare the rod and spoil the child,” resounded as the disciplinary mantra of parents in the early 20th century. Armed with leather belts and hairbrushes, parents tanned many a naughty hide at the first sign of disobedience in an effort to instill responsible behavior in their offspring.

Then came Benjamin Spock. Published in 1945—just in time for the post-World War II baby boom—Spock’s renowned book, Baby and Child Care, challenged conventional wisdom and changed the way parents raised their progeny. Widely accepted as the last word on parenting, it remained the second best-selling book next to the Bible throughout its first half-century of publication.

Spock’s prevailing message: “Don’t be afraid to trust your own common sense.” Running against the grain of previously accepted best-practices, he encouraged parents to show their children love and respect rather than coolness and corporal punishment. 

While many of Spock’s teachings still influence parental attitudes today, the road map for raising little Johnny and Jane has grown murky. From smother mothers and panda parents to helicopter dads and tiger moms, the ways in which children are now brought up reflect the latest trends more than parental instincts. 

So, what happened to the days when parents were simply parents? Well, life grew busier, more complex, and increasingly uncertain. “Parents, particularly those in affluent communities like Wilton, feel fear and responsibility for things they have no control over,” observes clinical psychologist, ADHD coach, and parenting consultant Susan Bauerfeld, PhD. “Wanting their children to excel in life, parents may guide them into activities that do not match their child’s abilities, skills and interests, then end up doing much of the work themselves so their kids can keep up.”

School can present similar challenges. “Most students are average, yet many parents find anything other than exceptional performance—taking AP courses and getting straight As—worrisome,” she continues. “As a result, top performing students wind up anxious and stressed while the rest feel marginalized. In the real world, people do not excel at everything, so why press children to do so?” 

According to Bauerfeld, who runs parenting workshops and seminars, as well as sees private clients, there are many satisfying and rewarding careers out there, so why not let children explore, reflect, and figure out who they are and where their talents and interests lie? Focusing on metrics-based outcomes such as GPAs and SAT scores doesn’t cultivate the collaborative skills, problem-solving competencies and good old-fashioned ingenuity needed in today’s world. Concerned about whether or not their kids are making the grade, parents may not afford children the room to make the mistakes that allow them to develop the self-reliance, resiliency and innovative thinking so important in adult life. 

Dr. Barbara Greenberg, a clinical psychologist in private practice in Weston and adolescent consultant at Silver Hill Hospital in New Canaan agrees. “As a parent, I understand how difficult it can be to watch your child fail. However, we’re doing our kids a disservice if we don’t allow them to make mistakes, sit with the negative feelings that result and learn to deal with them,” she says. “Disappointment is part of life.” 

Fretting they’ll lag behind their peers socially, many parents acquiesce to their children’s demands for video games, smart phones, and other electronics. “You need to have backbone to be a parent today,” says Wilton mother of 12- and 15-year-old sons, Nancy Gany. “There’s a new level of oversight required of parents once their kids start accessing more graphic TV programming and the Internet. Parents have to be comfortable saying, ‘R-rated movies may be allowed by your friends’ parents, but they’re not okay for our family.’” Adds Lisa Raymond, a Wilton mother who likes to keep things simple, “While other families head out of town for vacation, we stay home. That’s just fine by our daughter. She’s very happy playing outdoors, swimming at the Y, and being around her relatives.”

“At the end of the day,” advises Bauerfeld, “parents need to ask themselves, ‘What is our goal for our family—meaningful connections with our kids or another decal for the car?’ I believe the majority of parental energy should focus on building loving, collaborative, respectful relationships with children, which is empowering for everyone.”

Spock would agree. 

 

 

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May 2018

The US any Blue Angels headline the Jones Beach 15th Annual Memorial Day Weekend Air Show. Plus The Royal Canadian Air Force Snow Birds, the F22 Raptor the Air Force’s newest fighter...

Cost: Free

Where:
Jones Beach
895 Bay Pkwy
Wantagh, NY  11793
View map »


Website »

More information

KMR Arts is proud to present MAYDAY, an exhibition of new photographs by Barbara Vaughn. Please join us for the opening reception with the artist on June 2, 2018, from 3-7pm, 2 Titus Road,...

Cost: FREE

Where:
KMR Arts
2 Titus Road
Washington Depot , CT  06794
View map »


Website »

More information

SilverSource – the leading resource for older adults and their families– announced today that it is now accepting nominations for the 2018 SilverSource Awards.  The awards...

Cost: FREE

Where:
SilverSource, Inc.
2009 Summer Street, 3rd Floor
2949 Long Ridge Rd
Stamford, CT  06905
View map »


Sponsor: SilverSource, Inc.
Telephone: 203-324-6584
Contact Name: Kathleen Bordelon
Website »

More information

Oil paintings by Carol Brightman Johnson will be on display at the Smithy Store Loft Gallery from May 25 to July 7. Hours: daily from 10:00 to 5:30 Subjects include horses, dogs, orchids,...

Cost: Free

Where:
The Smithy Store Loft Gallery
10 Main St.
New Preston, CT  06777
View map »


Sponsor: The Smithy Store Loft Gallery
Telephone: 860-868-9003
Contact Name: Susan Newbury
Website »

More information

The Pirelli World Challenge series serves up races from all 7 car classes from the Big Dogs (Cadillacs, Bentley’s, Lomborghinis & Porches) to the TC class of Mustangs and BMW 228is, and...

Cost: $60

Where:
Lime Rock Park
60 White Hollow Rd
Lakeville , CT
View map »


Website »

More information

Morning exhale flow on the water! Yoga on the Boardwalk returns every Sunday morning, beginning in May, on the Harbor Point Boardwalk.  Led by our Yoga Teacher, Shannon Aleksa. Her...

Cost: Free

Where:
Harbor Point Boardwalk
1 Harbor Point Road
Stamford, CT  06902
View map »


Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to present “Melissa Meyer: Hitting the Right Notes,” her first solo exhibition with the gallery.  The show will open with a public reception...

Cost: Free

Where:
66 Elm Street
New Canaan, CT  06840


Sponsor: heathergaudiofineart.com
Telephone: 203-801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

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  Memorial Day in Lewisboro will once again be a day of celebration and remembrance with road races, children's games, artists, vendors, artisans, silent auction, food and live music in...

Cost: 0

Where:
South Salem Presbyterian Church
111 Spring Street
South Salem, NY  10590
View map »


Sponsor: South Salem Presbyterian Church
Telephone: 914-763-9282
Contact Name: Judy Office
Website »

More information

The “Salute Our Heroes” Memorial Day parade and remembrance ceremony is on Monday, May 28. The parade steps off from 21 River Road at 10 a.m. and then proceeds through Wilton...

Where:
Wilton, CT

More information

KMR Arts is proud to present MAYDAY, an exhibition of new photographs by Barbara Vaughn. Please join us for the opening reception with the artist on June 2, 2018, from 3-7pm, 2 Titus Road,...

Cost: FREE

Where:
KMR Arts
2 Titus Road
Washington Depot , CT  06794
View map »


Website »

More information

SilverSource – the leading resource for older adults and their families– announced today that it is now accepting nominations for the 2018 SilverSource Awards.  The awards...

Cost: FREE

Where:
SilverSource, Inc.
2009 Summer Street, 3rd Floor
2949 Long Ridge Rd
Stamford, CT  06905
View map »


Sponsor: SilverSource, Inc.
Telephone: 203-324-6584
Contact Name: Kathleen Bordelon
Website »

More information

Oil paintings by Carol Brightman Johnson will be on display at the Smithy Store Loft Gallery from May 25 to July 7. Hours: daily from 10:00 to 5:30 Subjects include horses, dogs, orchids,...

Cost: Free

Where:
The Smithy Store Loft Gallery
10 Main St.
New Preston, CT  06777
View map »


Sponsor: The Smithy Store Loft Gallery
Telephone: 860-868-9003
Contact Name: Susan Newbury
Website »

More information

The Pirelli World Challenge series serves up races from all 7 car classes from the Big Dogs (Cadillacs, Bentley’s, Lomborghinis & Porches) to the TC class of Mustangs and BMW 228is, and...

Cost: $60

Where:
Lime Rock Park
60 White Hollow Rd
Lakeville , CT
View map »


Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to present “Melissa Meyer: Hitting the Right Notes,” her first solo exhibition with the gallery.  The show will open with a public reception...

Cost: Free

Where:
66 Elm Street
New Canaan, CT  06840


Sponsor: heathergaudiofineart.com
Telephone: 203-801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

KMR Arts is proud to present MAYDAY, an exhibition of new photographs by Barbara Vaughn. Please join us for the opening reception with the artist on June 2, 2018, from 3-7pm, 2 Titus Road,...

Cost: FREE

Where:
KMR Arts
2 Titus Road
Washington Depot , CT  06794
View map »


Website »

More information

SilverSource – the leading resource for older adults and their families– announced today that it is now accepting nominations for the 2018 SilverSource Awards.  The awards...

Cost: FREE

Where:
SilverSource, Inc.
2009 Summer Street, 3rd Floor
2949 Long Ridge Rd
Stamford, CT  06905
View map »


Sponsor: SilverSource, Inc.
Telephone: 203-324-6584
Contact Name: Kathleen Bordelon
Website »

More information

Oil paintings by Carol Brightman Johnson will be on display at the Smithy Store Loft Gallery from May 25 to July 7. Hours: daily from 10:00 to 5:30 Subjects include horses, dogs, orchids,...

Cost: Free

Where:
The Smithy Store Loft Gallery
10 Main St.
New Preston, CT  06777
View map »


Sponsor: The Smithy Store Loft Gallery
Telephone: 860-868-9003
Contact Name: Susan Newbury
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to present “Melissa Meyer: Hitting the Right Notes,” her first solo exhibition with the gallery.  The show will open with a public reception...

Cost: Free

Where:
66 Elm Street
New Canaan, CT  06840


Sponsor: heathergaudiofineart.com
Telephone: 203-801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

KMR Arts is proud to present MAYDAY, an exhibition of new photographs by Barbara Vaughn. Please join us for the opening reception with the artist on June 2, 2018, from 3-7pm, 2 Titus Road,...

Cost: FREE

Where:
KMR Arts
2 Titus Road
Washington Depot , CT  06794
View map »


Website »

More information

SilverSource – the leading resource for older adults and their families– announced today that it is now accepting nominations for the 2018 SilverSource Awards.  The awards...

Cost: FREE

Where:
SilverSource, Inc.
2009 Summer Street, 3rd Floor
2949 Long Ridge Rd
Stamford, CT  06905
View map »


Sponsor: SilverSource, Inc.
Telephone: 203-324-6584
Contact Name: Kathleen Bordelon
Website »

More information

Oil paintings by Carol Brightman Johnson will be on display at the Smithy Store Loft Gallery from May 25 to July 7. Hours: daily from 10:00 to 5:30 Subjects include horses, dogs, orchids,...

Cost: Free

Where:
The Smithy Store Loft Gallery
10 Main St.
New Preston, CT  06777
View map »


Sponsor: The Smithy Store Loft Gallery
Telephone: 860-868-9003
Contact Name: Susan Newbury
Website »

More information

Wednesday, May 30 Author Talk: Margaret Reed and Joan Lownds - The Dogs of Camelot: Stories of the Kennedy Canines, 7 – 8:30 p.m. Before that tragic day on November 22, 1963, the Kennedy...

Cost: free

Where:
Wilton Library
137 Old Ridgefield Road
Wilton, CT  06897
View map »


Sponsor: Wilton Library
Telephone: 203-762-3950
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to present “Melissa Meyer: Hitting the Right Notes,” her first solo exhibition with the gallery.  The show will open with a public reception...

Cost: Free

Where:
66 Elm Street
New Canaan, CT  06840


Sponsor: heathergaudiofineart.com
Telephone: 203-801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

KMR Arts is proud to present MAYDAY, an exhibition of new photographs by Barbara Vaughn. Please join us for the opening reception with the artist on June 2, 2018, from 3-7pm, 2 Titus Road,...

Cost: FREE

Where:
KMR Arts
2 Titus Road
Washington Depot , CT  06794
View map »


Website »

More information

SilverSource – the leading resource for older adults and their families– announced today that it is now accepting nominations for the 2018 SilverSource Awards.  The awards...

Cost: FREE

Where:
SilverSource, Inc.
2009 Summer Street, 3rd Floor
2949 Long Ridge Rd
Stamford, CT  06905
View map »


Sponsor: SilverSource, Inc.
Telephone: 203-324-6584
Contact Name: Kathleen Bordelon
Website »

More information

Oil paintings by Carol Brightman Johnson will be on display at the Smithy Store Loft Gallery from May 25 to July 7. Hours: daily from 10:00 to 5:30 Subjects include horses, dogs, orchids,...

Cost: Free

Where:
The Smithy Store Loft Gallery
10 Main St.
New Preston, CT  06777
View map »


Sponsor: The Smithy Store Loft Gallery
Telephone: 860-868-9003
Contact Name: Susan Newbury
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to present “Melissa Meyer: Hitting the Right Notes,” her first solo exhibition with the gallery.  The show will open with a public reception...

Cost: Free

Where:
66 Elm Street
New Canaan, CT  06840


Sponsor: heathergaudiofineart.com
Telephone: 203-801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

KMR Arts is proud to present MAYDAY, an exhibition of new photographs by Barbara Vaughn. Please join us for the opening reception with the artist on June 2, 2018, from 3-7pm, 2 Titus Road,...

Cost: FREE

Where:
KMR Arts
2 Titus Road
Washington Depot , CT  06794
View map »


Website »

More information

SilverSource – the leading resource for older adults and their families– announced today that it is now accepting nominations for the 2018 SilverSource Awards.  The awards...

Cost: FREE

Where:
SilverSource, Inc.
2009 Summer Street, 3rd Floor
2949 Long Ridge Rd
Stamford, CT  06905
View map »


Sponsor: SilverSource, Inc.
Telephone: 203-324-6584
Contact Name: Kathleen Bordelon
Website »

More information

Oil paintings by Carol Brightman Johnson will be on display at the Smithy Store Loft Gallery from May 25 to July 7. Hours: daily from 10:00 to 5:30 Subjects include horses, dogs, orchids,...

Cost: Free

Where:
The Smithy Store Loft Gallery
10 Main St.
New Preston, CT  06777
View map »


Sponsor: The Smithy Store Loft Gallery
Telephone: 860-868-9003
Contact Name: Susan Newbury
Website »

More information

Twelve artists representing the NEST Arts Factory will be exhibiting at Wilton Library in June. The artists are Kristen Ambrosi, Patrice Barrett, Carlos Davila, Jane Davila, Gwen Hendrix, Phyllis...

Cost: free

Where:
Wilton Library
137 Old Ridgefield Road
Wilton, CT  06897
View map »


Sponsor: Wilton Library
Telephone: 203-762-3950
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to present “Melissa Meyer: Hitting the Right Notes,” her first solo exhibition with the gallery.  The show will open with a public reception...

Cost: Free

Where:
66 Elm Street
New Canaan, CT  06840


Sponsor: heathergaudiofineart.com
Telephone: 203-801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...

Introducing  . . . Objects of Desire: Style for the Garden and Home At the Wilton Historical Society A spectacular new show is set to debut! Objects of Desire brings a carefully...

Cost: $10

Where:
Wilton Historical Society
224 Danbury Road
Wilton, CT  06897
View map »


Website »

More information

Explore five private gardens in Redding, Ridgefield, and Wilton, open for self-guided tours to benefit the Garden Conservancy, 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Highlights include a reflecting pool with French...

Cost: $7 per garden; children 12 & under free

Where:
Garden of Ken Eisold
18 Chestnut Hill Road
Ridgefield, CT  06877
View map »


Sponsor: The Garden Conservancy
Telephone: 888-842-2442
Contact Name: Open Days Program staff
Website »

More information

Join us for a group hike in honor of Connecticut Trails Day 2018! Connecticut Trails Day (CTD) is part of National Trails Day® (NTD), a nationwide hiking initiative established...

Cost: Free

Where:
Woodcock Nature Center
54 Deer Run Road
Wilton, CT  06897
View map »


Website »

More information

Do you have a Thermomix or want to know more? Come for tips and tricks to cook with the world's most desired Kitchen Appliance, made in Germany and with more than 10 million followers around...

Cost: Free

Where:
Columbus Park Trattoria
205 Main Street
Stamford, CT  06901
View map »


Website »

More information

KMR Arts is proud to present MAYDAY, an exhibition of new photographs by Barbara Vaughn. Please join us for the opening reception with the artist on June 2, 2018, from 3-7pm, 2 Titus Road,...

Cost: FREE

Where:
KMR Arts
2 Titus Road
Washington Depot , CT  06794
View map »


Website »

More information

Oil paintings by Carol Brightman Johnson will be on display at the Smithy Store Loft Gallery from May 25 to July 7. Hours: daily from 10:00 to 5:30 Subjects include horses, dogs, orchids,...

Cost: Free

Where:
The Smithy Store Loft Gallery
10 Main St.
New Preston, CT  06777
View map »


Sponsor: The Smithy Store Loft Gallery
Telephone: 860-868-9003
Contact Name: Susan Newbury
Website »

More information

 This year's annual play reading brings a night of one-act plays performed by professional actors who are near and dear to New Pond Farm. This will be a collection of smart and funny short...

Cost: $40 per New Pond Farm member and $50 per non-member

Where:
New Pond Farm Education Center
101 Marchant Road
Redding, CT  06896
View map »


Telephone: (203) 938-2117
Website »

More information

Heather Gaudio Fine Art is pleased to present “Melissa Meyer: Hitting the Right Notes,” her first solo exhibition with the gallery.  The show will open with a public reception...

Cost: Free

Where:
66 Elm Street
New Canaan, CT  06840


Sponsor: heathergaudiofineart.com
Telephone: 203-801-9590
Contact Name: Rachael Palacios
Website »

More information

Show More...
Show Less...
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